After a long night of Remembrance/Birth Day partying; I came home to my apartment behind the nightclub. My roommate and I were just hanging out, chatting about the previous night and how crazy it was. When all of a sudden I noticed that I was eating a granola bar and skateboarding around the apartment.
That's when a thought dawned on me. I remembered being told by my parents when I was younger "Nyall, don't skateboard (or roller blade, or ride your bike, or anything with wheels pretty much) in the house!" Which is understandable, because I was a child it was just something I had to grow out of wanting to do. Time went on and eventually I just stopped trying. I never gave it any thought, it was just something I had grown out of.
However today I have discovered that it's quite possible that we never actually "grow out" of anything. It wasn't because I didn't want to skateboard in the house anymore, it was because my parents had told me so many times not to do it, that it had become something inevitable; I was not allowed to skateboard in the house. Though it would seem that in the absence of my authoritative parents, the urge to skateboard in the house comes back almost instinctively. I didn't even realize I was doing it until ran over a shoe.
This theory can be added to different experiences from the past as well. Take playing on a playground for example. If I were walking by a park that had a bunch of people at it. Whether it's parents, school teachers or just a bunch of random people, the urge to play isn't there. However when I see a playground that has been temporarily abandoned by the "pitter patter" of children running across it. I run as fast as I can toward it, and climb around like a fuckin' monkey. It's not that you actually grow out of the attraction of playing on a playground. It's because it becomes taboo for you to do so. So naturally when there are onlookers present you feel no need to play on the playground. And why would you? It's taboo remember? However, if no one can see you playing on the playground then automatically want to play grounders or something.
I've always said that I want to be like Peter Pan, and never grow up. But alas, time takes a hold of everyone and eventually you lose the innocence of childhood and the simplicity of life that is running around a playground or riding a skateboard in the house. But now having realized that it's not actually lost it's just lying dormant. So, maybe that's what Never Never Land is all about, it's about staying young on the inside. Never Never Land is childhood, but you're not allowed to stay there due to social norms and things becoming taboo for somebody who is older than 13 to do.
So I challenge you.
The next time no one is looking, do something childish and bask in the fountain of youth for a few minutes.
:)
Today I realized how much I missed long boarding downtown and wanted to pack up and head to San Fransisco and just longboard the streets for a year. Childhood is something I miss dearly. There are days I wanna go to the backfield, make a fort, ride my bike and have an apple fight. None of this school, money and bills crap, let's just all play grounders and act like children. ..I miss it SO BAD.
ReplyDeleteI did the same thing today. In a different way. I wasn't skateboarding around the house or anything like that, nor was I with anyone. Today, I was driving in my car when an old song from my childhood came on - I can't recall which right now. I blasted the music. Just instinctively turned it up. This is something I don't normally do - people usually have to tell me to turn it up because they can't hear it. But it was just one of those songs from my childhood. My mom would always tell me to turn the music down because it was hurting her head or something like that. I then came to realize I'm exactly like my father. When a song comes on from his teenage years, he turns it up so high that I'm sure cars stopped three or four cars behind us can hear it. It's instinctive.
ReplyDeleteI also have a saying that I like to live by from Peter Pan. It goes something like this: "Never say goodbye, because goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting." So, I'd like you to know that even though you're almost all the way across the country from me, I never said goodbye.